hmmm.

I am so sad right now. I miss Matt so much and its almost awkward missing him. I mean I have not seen him in 8 1/2 months. It is going to be so werid to see his face in person his face period! Skype has sucked so bad over there latey we dont get to Video skype any more! :( I miss the sweet look of his Video distorted face. I need him here. I have been lately feeling overwhelmed with things. Overwhelmed with taking care of two kids, taking care of 2 parents. Not talking to Matt every day or getting to talk to him for like 5 mins one day and not talk to him for 2 days. I need all the strength and patience I can get right now. I just need to pray and I know that. I just need to go to my friends and ask them to pray for me and ask them for help! I know that, I Know that I am so far in this deployment and its "Almost" over! I know that!!! I am the one living this moment irght now I am the one living this life right now and I know all the things I am going through are NORMAL! I just need to feel these feelings get over them and move on! I am being a baby at times an dI guess I am entitled to it but its hard feeling this way. All the prayers and friendships are so helping. Today I cleaned up the boys room and my room pretty good and that felt GREAT! Now like 5 more rooms to clean up really well before Matt gets home and lots I mean lots to get rid of or throw away. I know right now I need to live in the moment and not live in oh man I have 4 freaking months left but at this moment and at this time in my life that is super super hard!!! I am trying! :)